Tag Archives: Smoking

First Cigarette

9 Apr

My Take

DiVoran Lites

 

 

 

I saw Daddy’s cigarettes behind the bar.
And thought of glamorous movie stars
Holding cigarettes in dainty poses

One Camel won’t be missed
But what if Daddy catches me?
What if Mother is disappointed in me?
I drew one cigarette from the pack
Snatched a book of matches
And ran the two blocks home from
The restaurant we owned.

Hunkered down in the tall grass
That hid me completely
Without thinking of the smoke
That must rise into the blue sky
Without thinking of the tinder dry grass
Catching fire and burning down the house
I took a drag
Coughed…coughed…coughed
Ground it out in the dirt.

Didn’t smoke again
Until eight years later
Beauty school in Albuquerque
And a big contest to test our hairstyling
So nervous
At Toddlehouse my teacher, Monique
Gave me a cigarette
Here this will calm you down
Is dizzy the same as calm?
Monique gave me a whole pack
Take these home and practice

My young husband and I shared the habit.
After three years I yearned for a child
I worked until my seventh month
Not smoking because even the smell
Made me nauseous
I stopped then, stopped for years
Through the birth of another child
And the move to Space Center country
And I started again.
By then we knew smoking killed people

One day Bill asked the Lord to
Take away his craving for cigarettes
He pulled the pack from his shirt pocket and
Threw it in the trash.
He never smoked again
I prayed too and eventually
God helped me quit
Neither of us ever smoked again
Nor wanted to.
Thank Jesus for His saving grace.

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