Tag Archives: Parenting

How God removes our insecurities.

21 Sep

Walking by Faith, Not by Sight

Janet Perez Eckles

Reblogged September 21, 2019

I sat in the passenger’s seat as my friend and I headed to the mall. “Freedom,” she said, “kids in school, finally a little peace.”

I knew what she meant. As a blind mom of three little active boys, my job changed during the fall. No more summer days sprinkled with, I’m-bored-Mom moments.

Had I made a difference?

Decades flew by and now looking back I wonder if there’s anything I had done in those days that made a difference, taught them something worthwhile or left memories in their hearts.

Looking at my sons, now with their own families, I asked, “Hey guys, do you remember the notes I used to tape to your pillows?”

“I think I might still have some of them, mom,” my oldest son said.

“I remember the notes you’d put in our lunch boxes,” my middle son said. “I almost ate one of them by accident.”

I grinned. But secretly, I hoped they erased memories of moments when their Mom wasn’t so nice. Sometimes, I threw my hands up in the air and, in utter frustration, I ordered. “Okay, the three of you, in your room, and don’t come out until you know how to behave.”

It was nothing extraordinary.

But even in those days of discipline, God prompted me to spend a few seconds jotting simple words on a piece of paper. I stuffed them in their lunch boxes or taped them to their pillow.

Nothing extraordinary in that gesture. Only a simple way for them to know they were loved no matter where they were.

Although my love was genuine, my job as a mom seemed overwhelming at times. I questioned my abilities, doubted my decisions and feared my inadequacies to do enough for them.

But in that season of my insecurities, God was busy watching, listening and with the pen of His love, He was writing notes to me. The note in Psalm 23 was written to carry me through my days.

God reminded me:

He was my shepherd, I lacked nothing to make me the Mom He wanted me to be.

As I sent my three little guys to school, God made me lie down in the green pastures of reassurance that they would be safe from all harm.

He led me beside the quiet waters of peace knowing His hand covered them. Drained after a long day of chores—of cooking, cleaning the kitchen, folding laundry and picking up toys, He restored my soul.

And when I wondered on the path of worry, He guided me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.

When tragedies, conflict and violence filled the news, the shadow of gloom came over me. But though I was tempted to walk in the shadow of worry, I declared I would fear no evil for God would be with me and my children. His rod and His staff would comfort me.

And while preparing meals for the family, God reminded me that He prepared a table before me in the presence of my enemies called worry, doubt, anxiety or guilt.

God anointed my sons’ heads with the oil of purity and faith; Their cup would overflow. Surely goodness and love would follow me and my children all the days of our lives and we would dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

God’s note left on the pillow of our hearts carries the truth of His Word, the strength of His promise, and the guarantee they will come to be.

Let’s Pray

Father, thank you for lifting from my heart feelings of guilt, insecurity and blame. I praise You for filling my days with peace, reassurance and trust in Your promises. In Jesus’ name, amen.

What are God’s notes telling you today?

Janet

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Did you know I wrote a book filled with words of encouragement, uplifting thoughts and illustrations of real-life triumph to empower you? Its title, Trials of Today, Treasures for Tomorrow: Overcoming Adversities in Life. You can get it HERE.

CLICK HERE for a one-minute inspirational video.

Looking for a speaker for your upcoming event? A great speaker makes the difference between a so-so event and one that shines with impact. I invite you to view one of my two-minute videos HERE.

Please share: Feel free to share Janet’s posts with your friends.

Janet Eckles Perez

Some say she should be the last person to be dancing. Her life is summarized in this 3-minute video: http://bit.ly/1a8wGJR

Janet Perez Eckles’ story of triumph is marked by her work as an international speaker, #1 best-selling author, radio host, personal success coach and master interpreter. Although blind since 31, her passion is to help you see the best of life.

www.janetperezeckles.com

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Twelve ways to know you’re a good mom

29 Sep

Walking by Faith, Not by Sight

Janet Perez Eckles

Twelve ways to know you’re a good mom.

Reblogged September 29, 2018

“Summer is over and we need to get into a new routine,” my daughter-in-law said to my grandkids.

Being a young mom…and being blind.

Her comment took me to those busy days I had as a young mom. Mornings when my sons were in grade school and I was busy ironing their uniforms and packing those lunch boxes with nutritious stuff (most of which sadly, they brought right back home).

But that was the easy part, being blind; helping them with their homework was tough. How I wished I could see if they wrote the right answers, or how good it would be if I could read the teachers’ notes. My muscles tensed, thinking of how my blindness would affect them. Some days tears trickled down. And lamenting my days gone by when I could see added to my grief.

But God was good to me.

He sent a friend who opened the eyes of my heart.

“If you think about it,” she said, “your kids are really God’s children. He is their Father and He’s in charge of all big and small things.”

I wiped my tears, inhaled a deep sigh, and let that truth sink into my heart. It brought the encouragement I needed to sweep away those “poor-me” notions, and sparked a renewed passion to care for my sons.

What makes a good mom?

With a brighter outlook and a fresh love for my role as their mom, I compiled my own list of what makes a “good” mom:

  1. A Mom who uses prayer as her powerful weapon to defend her children.
  2. A Mom who knows mistakes will be corrected in the hands of a loving God.
  3. A Mom who might go to sleep at night with dishes still in the sink, but a bedtime story in her kid’s heart.
  4. A Mom who knows perfection will only happen on the other side of heaven.
  5. A Mom who sees her kid’s weaknesses and still smiles at his strengths.
  6. A Mom who places guilt in the garbage disposal of life.
  7. A Mom who leaves fingerprints on the glass door to place an imprint of love in her kid’s heart.
  8. A Mom who looks in the mirror and smiles because she is molding one of the leaders of tomorrow.
  9. A Mom who picks shoes off the floor, thankful her kids can walk.
  10. A Mom who listens to endless chatter, thankful her kids can talk.
  11. A Mom who’s signed a partnership with God.
  12. A Mom who stirs this sweetener in the coffee cup of her heart: “I can do all things through the Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)

And while she drops exhausted in bed at the end of the day, truth shines through: It’s not the items checked off on the to-do list. Accomplishments managed. The applause never heard or the help always needed. But the certainty that echoes in her heart: her true greatness is in the Father’s eyes. Her sorrows are in his heart. And her triumphs are in His plans.

Let’s Pray

Father, thank you for your reassurance that my children are yours first. They belong to you and therefore, they’re under your divine care. Thank you for the peace that truth brings me. In Jesus’ name, amen.

What promise from God makes your job as a Mom easier?

Did you know I wrote a book about the days when my blindness came? But a beautiful journey took me to joy once again? It’s titled: Trials of Today, treasures for Tomorrow. I wrote it for you. Check it out here: https://janetperezeckles.com/store

Janet

______________________________________

Did you know I wrote a book filled with words of encouragement, uplifting thoughts and illustrations of real-life triumph to empower you? Its title, Trials of Today, Treasures for Tomorrow: Overcoming Adversities in Life. You can get it HERE.

CLICK HERE for a one-minute inspirational video.

Looking for a speaker for your upcoming event? A great speaker makes the difference between a so-so event and one that shines with impact. I invite you to view one of my two-minute videos HERE.

Please share: Feel free to share Janet’s posts with your friends.

Source: https://janetperezeckles.com/blog/courage/twelve-ways-to-know-youre-a-good-mom.html

 

Janet Eckles Perez

Some say she should be the last person to be dancing. Her life is summarized in this 3-minute video: http://bit.ly/1a8wGJR

Janet Perez Eckles’ story of triumph is marked by her work as an international speaker, #1 best-selling author, radio host, personal success coach and master interpreter. Although blind since 31, her passion is to help you see the best of life.

www.janetperezeckles.com

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Apollo 11 and One Proud Mama

17 Jul

On the Porch

Onisha Ellis

 

Ok, I am going to come right out and say it, no finesse or beating around the bush. I am one proud 3d cover Jessiemama.  Jessie, the newest novel by my daughter Rebekah Lyn released yesterday.  She has written other three novels  but this one is special to me.  It is an historical fiction that covers 1960- 1969 and set in the town where she and her father were raised.  Even though she wasn’t alive during this time, through extensive research and conversations with locals she has managed to capture the spirit of the decade consumed with the race for the moon.

I was surprised when she chose four boys as her main characters. At one point during the writing process, she sighed and said “being a teen-age boy is exhausting.” Never the less, during the writing  process, each boy became a part of our family. I felt like she had given me four grandsons, but without the need to feed a teen’s ravenous appetite.

Jessie is available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, iTunes and Smashwords. Visit her website for links.

http://rebekahlynbooks.com/counting-apollo-11-launch-jessie-release

Jessie already has some great reviews on Amazon. Click HERE if you want to check them out.

Thank you for stopping by and  sharing in my proud  mama moment. Of course as always giving thanks and glory to our wonderful Lord who inspires, sustains and opens doors we could never imagine. He even places people in your life like my friend Pam, with the talents you desperately need.

Oh, I almost forgot. Rebekah has been chosen to be a social media reporter on Monday July 21, 2014 and will be tweeting from Kennedy Space Center. I am not sure of the time, but I know it will be after 9am.  If you are on twitter, her handle is @rebekahlyn1

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There’s Always Hope

24 Jun

My Take

DiVoran Lites

 Author, Poet and Artist

A few years ago, a tall handsome young man we knew, we’ll call him Dexter, wanted some help writing a letter to his dad. The young man was sixteen years old. He had a good guardian, but he wanted to write a real letter to his real dad who was in prison.

He was in band that year and had vowed to make straight A grades. He wanted to catch up by taking online classes so he could graduate with his class. I don’t’ think he’d seen his father since he was a small child. Dexter had no money. He had no way to get to the post-office. Since we believe in teaching self-reliance, we didn’t automatically help out. But by the time a month had passed and he still had no stamp, we broke down and gave him one.

I really don’t know whether his dad got the letter or whether Dexter got a reply. I do know that the boy dropped out of school his senior year, left his stand-in father and mother’s home, and got a job at a fast food restaurant. This spring somehow, miraculously, he graduated from his class and his mother who has also been in prison was there to see him do it. Not his dad, though, I think he’s a lifer.

It wasn’t easy for his guardians to rear him and his sister, they have other children of their own. But what hope it brings to the whole world just to hear this one success story. The sister is doing well in school and plans to enter the military as soon as she graduates. Both of the young people have developed good common sense and the Lord is on their side. No matter how bad things look at first there’s always hope.

What are you praying for that may look a bit iffy right now?

 

 

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Wild Mushrooms

17 Jun

My Take

DiVoran Lites

Author, Poet and Artist

I journal every morning. Two of the things I do are suggestions from Jill Badonsky in her book, “The Awe-Manac.”  First I paste a page from a scripture calendar in the journal. Then I write a name for myself for each day, something made-up, whatever pops into my head, and after that, I write a list of things I get to do today. Last week  I noticed it was June 9. Here’s most of my journal entry for that day.

Today I get to celebrate Ivan’s birthday. He would be 98, if he hadn’t died ten years ago. He was our dad, my brother’s and mine.We always celebrated his birthday and Father’s Day combined. Our favorite gift was a box of chocolate covered cherries. He treasured them so much we found them still in his underwear drawer untouched at Christmas.

One time, Ivan made his own hand-rolled chocolates. They took a lot of time and trouble and they were delicious.

Another time he brewed beer in a huge stoneware crock and put it in his daughter room. (That’s me.) Her boyfriend came over to visit one time when Ivan wasn’t there and the daughter was talking about the beer and the boyfriend wanted to see it. When he looked at the foamy crock and smelled the aroma, he wanted to try it. So she dipped a glassful for him. Ivan didn’t consider the brew to be done, and maybe it wasn’t, because the boyfriend felt sick soon after that and went home.

The ultimate test of loyalty and trust was when Bill and I visited Mother and Dad in Ft. Bragg, in northern California. Dad invited us to go out in a field with him and pick mushrooms that would accompany the steaks he was char grilling that night. He showed us what to look for and set us loose in the field. It was as much fun as an Easter egg hunt and the mushrooms tasted wonderful and memorable with the steak. We felt fine after we ate and still do. (Don’t try this at home, mushrooms can be poisonous)

The food Dad liked best was a mess of ham hocks and pinto beans with onions. He usually cooked them in a pressure cooker. That can be a dangerous undertaking, but he was undaunted, even knowing that people had blown up their pressure cooker and had to clean beans off their ceilings. Beans are gassy you know. That never happened to Dad. He had control over his cooking.

I must admit, in some ways, Dad was what is fondly called a character. Whenever you felt you had to ask a question you’d get one of two answers. He chose the one that felt most appropriate to him. You may use them if you need them. Dad would be honored.

1.    “Not knowing and having no means of ascertaining, I feel a certain delicacy in indefinitely stating.”

I always wondered where that one came from and when he took the time to memorize it. Still do. I memorized it too. One more thing before I tell you his other answer. Dad wasn’t exactly an academic, more a work-with-his hands kind of guy. After he retired, he lived next door to a man who once was a teacher. Dad called him the professor, and he fixed a lot of household items for him. He said if the professor left him alone to get on with it, he wouldn’t charge him anything, but if he stayed around to watch and talk he would charge five dollars an hour. However, any time the professor wanted to help, it would cost him ten dollars because whatever he did, Dad would have to do all over again.

So anyhow, here’s Dad’s second favorite answer to most questions:

2.    “Are you writing a book?”

“No.”
       End of subject.

But then one day after I had started writing a book, I asked him a question and he said, “Are you writing a book?” I knew I’d surprise him when I said yes, and then he’d have to answer my question, so I said,

“Yes.” That was so gratifying. Surely he’d be proud.

“Leave that chapter out.” Whoosh, I wasn’t going to get an answer after all.

But you know, it could have partially been his, “Are you writing a book, “that influenced me to actually write one. After all, most of us want to please our parents. Anyhow, I enjoy writing books and I thank Dad, for his interest and for his unique personality.

Psalm 103:13 
As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; (NIV)

Ivan

Ivan

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Father Daughter Action Plan

28 Apr

SUNDAY MEMORIES

Judy Wills

 JUDY

Father Daughter Action Plan 

That title in the Thursday newspaper reminded me of a time that our family enjoyed quite a bit.Back in the mid 1970’s, we were living on an AF Base and, because Fred was an officer, were required to be members of the Officer’s Club.  So, for the dues we had to pay for that pleasure, we thought to have a meal there at least once each month.  However, the food was less than great.

 While we were there, the club began giving out a “chit” for a free meal each month when they sent the bill, to encourage more attendance at their facility.

Well, we didn’t want to waste the “free” meal, even though we really didn’t enjoy eating there that much. But then a plan occurred to me – how about a Date Night between Father and Daughter?  Neither of the girls really had a lot of just “Daddy” time, so I thought this might be a good way for them to have some quality time with Daddy, and be treated like a lady should be treated by a gentleman.  And Fred is definitely a gentleman.  His momma taught him well!

So the plan went into action.  One supper evening each month, one of our daughters would get dressed to the nines, and would go to the O’ Club with Daddy.  He would help her into the car, pull out/push in her chair at the table, and they would just visit with each other while they ate.

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The next month, the other daughter would get dressed to the nines, and go to the O’ Club with Daddy.  And she would be treated like a lady by a gentleman.

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The girls loved it – they still say it is one of their fondest memories.  They would usually wear a long dress, get their hair fixed “just so,” possibly wear a “touch” of makeup, and be on their best behavior.   So each daughter had her quality time with Daddy, and Daddy got to know his girls a bit better.  Fun for all.

The remaining daughter and I would have hamburgers.

 

As a footnote to this:  when I told a good friend about this plan, she harumphed and said she would have to teach her husband to be a gentleman first!

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Enjoy the Differences

25 Mar

My Take

DiVoran Lites

Photo by Melodie Hendrix

Photo by Melodie Hendrix

The other day Bill and I were in the kitchen cooking breakfast, and he told me about a dream he had. He was working with my dad, something he did whenever the folks came from California for a visit or we went there. Dad loved to putter and fix things. Bill wanted to hang out with him, so they did projects that mother and I came up with for them.

Bill is an engineer; Dad was a man of many trades, race jockey, welder, gas company manager, large equipment fixer in a tomato factory, meat cutter, restaurant owner, pilot, and, most important, fisherman. Ah well, you get the picture; he could do many things.

Bill can do anything, too, or so it seems to me. He was mostly a mechanical engineer with the Space program, specializing in ordnance.

So anyhow, the dream was about Bill and Dad working together. In the dream, Bill was frustrated as he always was when he worked alongside Dad. Dad put his tools down just any old where and couldn’t’ find them the next time he needed them. He drilled big holes with gusto when Bill thought smaller, more sedate holes would have given a closer tolerance and worked better. Dad’s been home in heaven a while now, and we laughed at the silly dream until I started to cry. I hardly ever cry so it felt good.

I finally figured out why I was crying. I could see Dad and Bill in the driveway working on something. I could have walked out there, joined them, and got a lot of joy seeing the two of them together and being amused by the differences in work styles. If it were now, I wouldn’t need to try to make one like the other or change them. Now that I’m older, can see how unique each person is. I can accept them and enjoy the differences. It makes life a lot more fun and less stressful, too.

Psalm 139:13

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Our Trip Across America-Part 12

26 Dec

   A Slice of Life                       

 Bill Lites

Bill

 

We headed East out of Westcliffe on SR-96 and then South on SR-165 so we could stop and take a tour of one the most interesting local attractions in the area.  It’s called Bishop Castle.  Located on the edge of the San Isabel National Forest, it is a truly amazing structure.  What started out to be a one-room stone cottage in 1969, over the years, has turned into a life’s project, for Jim Bishop, who has built the entire “Castle” by hand.  As it stands now, the “Castle” has three full stories of interior rooms, complete with a Grand Ballroom, soaring towers and bridges with vistas of a hundred miles, and a Fire-Breathing Dragon, all making the Bishop Castle a most unforgettable experience!

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We picked up I-25 North out of the mountains, stopping in Pueblo to visit DiVoran’s grade school friend Joan and her family.  She and DiVoran had a wonderful time remembering “The Good Old Days” they spent growing up together in Westcliffe.  It wasn’t long after leaving Pueblo, heading East on US-50 that we had our 2nd flat tire on the camper.   I guess all those sharp rocks we encountered going up and down Hermit Lake Road weakened that old tire.  We were able to find a replacement tire in Lamar, CO and were soon back on the road toward Dodge City, Kansas.

 

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Of course, we had to stop for a spell in what was the famous frontier town to have a Sarsaparilla at the Long Branch Saloon, and take a stroll out to see Boot Hill, where some of the West’s most famous outlaws were laid to rest.

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From there, it was on East through parts of Kansas and Missouri, where we encountered some of the vast mid-American heartland, with its huge farms of miles and miles of lush wheat and corn crops.

 

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At some point we crossed that grand old  Mississippi River, with all its commerce and history.  Boy that sure is a lot of water!  It was about this time in the trip that we had our 3rd camper tire flat.  What a pain!  I said to myself, Come on now, there are only three tires on this camper, and now we have had all three go flat.  I hope this will be the last of them!

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If the picture above looks familiar, it’s because I was becoming an expert at changing those camper tires.  After replacing that 3rd tire, we now had three brand new tires on the camper, and we never had another tire problem with that camper as long as we had it.

7

We continued our travels Southeast, making stops in Tennessee and George, and we were awed by the sights of some of the most beautiful parts of the Appalachian Mountains we passed through.

8

As we got closer to home, we stopped in Atlanta, Georgia and Tallahassee, Florida.  Part of the joy of this trip was to experience the different parts of the country, its history, and the way people have lived down through the years.  The southern plantations were of special interest and beauty, as they were surrounded  by so much history and grandeur.

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What a great adventure we had visiting our good friends and relatives and seeing all those wonderful sights across our beautiful country.  But now we were heading for the barn, and there was no way to stop us.  After the six weeks on the road, we were all ready to get home, see our Florida friends and sleep in our own beds again.  Boy did that feel good!

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By the way, remember the freeze-dried brine shrimp we bought in Salt Lake City, Utah?  Well, sure enough, when we got home, we put them in water, and they came back to life.  That was Amazing!   Who knows, maybe this is where the Science Fiction folks got some of their ideas.

Well, that just about wraps up “Our Trip Across America.”  I hope you have enjoyed it as much as we did.

 

—-The End —-

 

 

 

 

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E is for Enough

24 Dec

My Take

DiVoran Lites

DiVoran Lites

Bill and I are incompatible. The first time I realized it was the morning after the wedding when I got in trouble for squeezing the toothpaste tube from the middle. How was I supposed to know you rolled it up tidily? Right then I decided I was not a roll-up kind of gal. We have used separate toothpaste tubes ever since. We even use different kinds of toothpaste now.

Then there is gasoline. He buys it all because he knows where its cheapest. I ask to buy when the gauge is on E, but he says, oh, you’ve got enough to get you where you’re going and back, and I always do—except there was that one time down in Texas when we were driving a new old car and E meant what it said-empty. I’m grateful we didn’t have to walk as far as we might have had to.

Carrots, now, carrots are something else altogether. In my humble opinion, you can never have too many carrots. I keep canned ones on hand but come on now, they just aren’t the same. “Carrots,” I write on the list. When we go over it he says, “We’ve got enough carrots.” Maybe for you, but not for me.

Time: Bill likes what you call close tolerance. That means you measure something like a door that opens onto the enclosed back porch, then you measure for a fan and put it up and turn it on and when you open the back door and the fan is whirling you can’t see a gap between them. So close tolerance goes for time as well. He doesn’t like to waste it by getting someplace too early, but unfortunately we’ve always been just late enough to embarrass me. Since he’s been retired, however, we’ve been working on it. We calculate what time we have to be there and then count back to when we may need to leave. It works most of the time. If it’s really crucial I don’t answer directly when he says what time do we have to be there. I say we need to leave at 8:30 or whatever I deem respectable. I sometimes say we have to leave at 8:32 and it works. I read about that somewhere. I don’t know why it works. Depending on how desperate I am we can get there just a little bit early. That’s nice for weddings and funerals, so you don’t have to disturb prayers and stuff. But the last funeral we went to was a little disorganized, we got there a good ten minutes early and I was proud. But the funeral didn’t actually start for an hour and a half after we got there. We had some nice quiet chats with some nice people, but there’s no telling how far it set my training program back.

We are compatible in the big things. Our kids tried the old switcheroo a few times: if dad says no, ask Mom, but Mom almost always had dad’s heart on the matter and agreed with him, so they soon gave up on that one. We also agree that lots of small and large things are funny and we laugh together. If we had memorized the Apostle’s Creed we’d be able to say it together with complete commitment. Jesus is Lord.

So although we are incompatible we still are pretty unified. What does that Bible verse say? “Behold how good and pleasant it is for brothers to dwell together…” As you know we aren’t brothers, but still it’s pretty fine to harmonize as husband and wife. Psalm 133:1

By Divoran

By Divoran

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